I Do Indeed Have A Father

I get to go see Tami. God provided me with the money for tickets and everything. He is so good. Thank you more than I can say.I will be flying with Asher and Gannah. I am excited. I have not been anywhere with them. Looking forward to it. Looking forward to seeing grand son Diego too along with meeting Tami's husband. Thank you again.

We have been asking to hear from Brent. Well the other day I got a letter from him. The next thing is to see how to respond to his letter without being to hasty. He is asking for money, and for me to supply my phone number so he can give as a point of reference to his getting out time in July. He said he wanted to come back here to live to get on his feet. The letter was written by somebody else. A matter of finding out what is next.

I got the privilege today to go to Millington to the gathering. We had a good time. Tim gave David Ben a funny birthday card and a t-shirt with, something special written on it but I forget, sorry. Plus Tim had told him that he had hoped it not only be his physical birthday but spiritual one. Tim told him he doesn't have to be cool that God loves him as he is. It was really sweet. Judah sang a song for his wife just to express that he still thinks of her while he works , It was a very sweet song, I saw David Ben cry through it.We danced and that was fun, yes even for me after crying for years every time I had to dance. I had the privileged of meeting little John , Andrea's son. I was very drawn to him . Before we left the house to come home after the gathering I told him how I enjoyed his playing the instrument he had played for a very short time. Anyway, Andrea and I was talking when she had said something to the effect of how he wants people to thinks he is ugly,her saying th...

We had a passage for the twin girls. It was incredible. So full of God, so different than others. The girls was given so much. And I must say it was the first one in a long time that I was able to just enjoy from beginning to end , not to say that the other passages was not full and good. I don't know exactly why but I felt freer.I loved all of what the ladies brought. The night before the passage I typed up a poem for the twins called "Till The Stars Appear". It felt peaceful and ready. During the passage though, smile , another group had did the same poem for them even in being a word poem that I could not pull off that I wanted to do. So after this group went I pondered , now what? Well God has a sense of humor that I got to experience. I felt He said that it's like lolly pops having different flavors so I presented them anyway and felt at peace and delighted to be able to do so. Thank you my sisters for all that you have done for me in these years. I am finally fr...

This morning I woke up and the verses about God's promises and all ran through my head. I was determined today to practice doing something towards the Kingdom of God today that I have a way to be a part of. I got alot done today and enjoyed doing it. Today while I pondered and am memorizing 2 Peter 1:3 I started thinking of how to apply this, thoughts and convictions started washing me it seemed. I sat and realized that for awhile that I am so full of some disappointments concerning the petting zoo. I hope I can get this out to where it makes since. As I sat and being convicted about for so long I have waited for things to happen at the petting zoo, I would try for a spell and quit or get discouraged , I use the reason cause of not enough support, but after reading and pondering on this one verse alone even, that is not the reason. I always think things like I can't just make things happen, with what can I do that? Well those are really crazy thoughts. Unbelieving in the fact ...

Shammah was teaching tonight about denying ourselves and believing in God's promises. I can't do his teaching any justice so I will express what I have been thinking about. Where we started reading from 2 Peter 1:3. Which the title of it says Growth in the Faith. This is a very powerful verse : For His divine power has given us everything required for life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness. That is an amazing thought that since His divine power has provided everything for life and godliness, we have no excuse at all. Wow. Well, I am sitting here looking at this and for once I am not sitting feeling like oh no I can't ever reach that. I am thinking I have work to do with help of course. I get so feeble minded so often unfortunately that I am still trying to learn some of the basics, sadly to say. I don't want to be that way. When Shammah said that the only difference between Abba and us is that he denies him...

Where to start. When my children grew up we all had a rough life. I did not know how to be a parent for one, my life in general was a mess and with much regret did not have much to offer to my children in reality of hope. I ran out of that years before I had children. Just going through life cause it was there. When I was raising my children I can remember the sweet moments with them and wanted to hold on to that forever. Not knowing who our maker was. I always wondered will I ever find the right husband who could love the children who could love me and who could I love. I always questioned those things. Thinking how could my children ever grow up and get what they needed without somebody other than me. It seems though My Father had a plan long before I knew about it even. Back in 1996 I came to meet God's people. Wow. I knew they had something I had no clue about. Everything I could have thought I knew about who God was went out the window. I am glad for that. I was a beggar that ...

It is the hardest thing to do is have a relationship with people. smile. One day maybe that thought will fade but for now My Father has to deal with me quite often. Good thing or I really would be left to myself. The other night Annie and I sat with Simchah and Naqi. Well we do need to be aware of the fight that is going on. Not against each other as we most often get tangled up thinking. I thank God Simchah believes in me enough to where she knows where in the walk and fight I would like to be. She mostly always has a way of doing that even if it don't feel good. I just did not see Annie. Trapped in my own thought unfortunately. I am very thankful My Father knows what I need. The next step is to see his hand and face sooner when it is the heat of the battle and fight with My Father and not against Him.

I have been in the body of Christ for awhile. I don't know if I can make since of this but I am gonna try. Before I came life was a big blur and disastrous. There is some parts I remember all too well and some I think God has covered my memory up from the torture. I titled this blog I Do Indeed Have A Father , for a reason. When I grew up I had 7 step dads that was all drinkers. How I managed that I don't know accept it was the hand of My Heavenly Father in whom I did not know. I grew pretty resentful in those days. I was so mad at my mom then, did not understand how this could happen. Time passed and I came to realize with help of forgiveness given to me that she did only what she knew. In which is a neat story if I can get it out. It was several years ago shortly after we as Rose Creek Village moved to this new land Haddashah that I was still struggled greatly with many ,many things bitterness is one, it had a death grip. Hope I can make sense of this. I remember having a co...